2016-03 March

FGCC rides in March 2016.

Saturday 5th March Monarch’s Way ride (or not-Monarch’s Way ride).
From Mr Kersley the following summary:

“Thanks to all for the great adventure that was the ‘not Monachs way’ ride

A vast array of artefacts were required to enable the 6 riders

1. 4 cars
2. 7 separate trains
3. 11 breakfasts
4. 4 pubs
5 . A restaurant
6. A cafe
7. A trombone
8. 7 pints of beer

Tradition was upheld until west Dean where the peleton split allowing JR and TM to head south to Chichester (notTEMKEK). The remaining peleton experienced the delights of an ascent of St Roches hill without the benefit of Harvey’s.

The peleton continued through to the approach to Bognor hill where an alternative route through Eartham to the spur at Slindon for lunch . Subsequently Roy headed to at Albans whilst messes Budd / Thomas and Kersley made way through woods and watercress beds to Arundel for tea and a reunion with John for the final triathlon leg through Binsted swamps and river bed arriving Barnham 5.20pm

Approx 37 miles … No blasteets

Learning
1. St Roches hill is easier without beer
2. The George at Eartham is a popular destination
3. Not all trains stop at Arundel

Great fun.”

Mr Topley added.
“A fine account, but the number of trains may require revision (to 8 trains).
After Mr Roche detained at Horsham to return to Arundel, the ever-helpful Southern announced that the train wold not stop at Three Bridges either, and passengers were invited to change to a further and better (insofar as stopping was concerned) train.
A great day out!”

Mr Thomas added further:
“Perhaps one addition to your conclusion – 4. Maybe there is a purpose to the knobbly bits on tyres?

Never thought I’d hear myself say that – visit to a psychiatrist needed.”

In the true tradition of talking b******s on a ride, a definition of the acronym the “plague” emerged as;
Petty
Little
Annoying
Gits
Upsetting
Events

….perfectly describing the stresses currently being experienced by one member, as well as those suffered by others in the past, and for which the FGCC is the perfect antidote.

Saturday 12th March 08.00am ride
ZA, RK, RT.
Shoreham loop selected so as to give Downslink riders an opportunity for training on continuous flat section along the sea front.
Cissbury, Steyning Road, Coombe Farm, Shoreham old bridge, brek at Truffles, across the bridge to Shoreham beach, along the sea front to Worthing, up Grand Avenue, West Worthing and the gallops to return to Findon.
Total 19 miles.

Friday/Saturday 18th/19th March Downslink and NW Passage ride.

Riders:
Mr. C Budd (formerly of Italy, currently residing for most of the time in Pulborough)
Mr. Roy Kruger (formerly of Zimbabwe, currently residing for most of the time in Hertfordshire)
Mr. Paul Topley (formerly of Enfield and later Turvey House, currently residing for most of the time in Mayfield)

Hangers on:
Mr. Tim Kersley (formerly of Worthing, currently residing for most of the time at Kersley Towers in Findon)
Mr. J Roche (formerly of Worthing, currently residing for most of the time at WHQ in Findon – part time in Tanah Rata).

Riders left WHQ on time at 11.15. Apparently ride was uneventful (no blasteets), remarkably sober (just the one pint at the Onslow Arms) and very healthy – no stop at the chip shop at Cranleigh, all to achieve an exact, on-time and delay-free rendezvous with JR at Bramley; the latter had driven to Jeans (Mrs. Deeks to you) and then undertaken some R&D work via the River Wey towpath to Godalming and then various hills in an attempt to find another route from Jean’s to the Downslink. The latter pioneering work was largely unsuccessful: hills covered with mud that made Diginwell Lane look tarmacked. The healthy kick from the peloton had somehow infected JR who, en-route to the rendezvous, had stopped to buy a bag of salad which was offered to others in lieu of chocolate bars.

Man of destiny or destiny of man?

Man of destiny or destiny of man?

Taking a break

Taking a break

Thence to Jean’s and later The Queen Victoria where we found an overstocked cellar and manfully went about helping out with the de-stocking process! Food okay but not as good as last year (new owners).
After brek JR took bags + PT to Findon, collected TK and met Peloton of Roy and Chris at Henfield. For those who may have lost the plot at this point the list of riders had now become:

Mr. C Budd (formerly of Italy, currently residing for most of the time in Pulborough)
Mr. Roy Kruger (formerly of Zimbabwe, currently residing for most of the time in Hertfordshire)
Mr. Tim Kersley (formerly of Worthing, currently residing for most of the time at Kersley Towers in Findon)
Mr. J Roche (formerly of Worthing, currently residing for most of the time at WHQ in Findon – part time in Tanah Rata).

Retired:

Mr. Paul Topley (formerly of Enfield and later Turvey House, currently residing for most of the time in Mayfield)

Lunch at a newly refurbished Trufflles in Steyning. Uneventful return to WHQ (apart from the great mayonnaise debacle described elsewhere).

Riders dispersed as follows:

Mr. Paul Topley (retired), returned to Mayfield – doubtless to contemplate his return to Redferns
Mr. C Budd returned to Pulborough – doubtless to contemplate his return to Italy.
Mr. Roy Kruger returned to Lancing – doubtless to contemplate his return to Hertfordshire.
Mr. Tim Kersley returned to Kersley Towers – doubtless to contemplate his return to The Taj Dah.
Mr. J Roche returned to WHQ – definitely to contemplate his return to Tanah Rata.

The mayonnaise incident!
Mr Kersley reported: “Those hazy lazy days in Italy have led to a dilution of standards ‘ the hand of Budd ‘ has been captured midst ‘ a crime against mayonnaise’. The proprietors of truffles Steyning have been notified”

Not up to the mayonnaise standard

Not up to the mayonnaise standard

.

Mr Roche added: “I’m afraid that the situation is a lot worse than Tim’s kindly and diplomatic e-mail suggests. Close examination of the photo will reveal that the (sweet, young, eligible, fiancé-in waiting) waitress at the newly refurbished Truffles in Steyning had diligently placed a teaspoon next to the mayonnaise for the express purpose dictated by the standard that Richard has worked so tirelessly to maintain.

I’m sorry to report that Chris had been demonstrating somewhat ‘continental’ behaviour the whole weekend, including a great deal of ‘following from in front’.

I blame myself of course; in Richard’s absence it was down to me to ensure the maintenance of standards and clearly I failed (How disappointed Richard must be feeling this morning doesn’t bear thinking about). I put it to you all that Chris has spent far too much time brushing shoulders with our friends from across the water (both in Europe and in the Antipodes) and that a series of short master classes will ensure a return to normality.”

Saturday 26th March 08.00am ride
Easter Saturday and no doubt all engaged in family activities so no one out for a ride.

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